You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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