How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
