do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize
