In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
