Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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