By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
