the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize
