i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
ttyl tear gas
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
