I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize