I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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