R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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