wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
