i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
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