how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
