He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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