I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize