He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
His nipple licking is glorious
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