i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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