it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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