He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
