oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
