the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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