He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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