Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
