I wanna passion pit in your ass
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
But break dance skills will only take you so far
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
