were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
