that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
