We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
