woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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