I love black thongs
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
