It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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