Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
