I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
