Swine flu. Run for my life!
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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