He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
