he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
either way he was missing a nipple.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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