Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize