Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
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