i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Randomize