Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
