btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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