if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize