wanna go halves on a baby?
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
