Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
