Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
She's the barista slut.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
