we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
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