She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
