maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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