he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
My bed smells like the plague
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
