I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
