Taylor Swift is so right about you.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
